Ok, so the last month has been rough. But everyone goes through these bad times that test the soul and strengthen the character. So you buck up and get through it and something will start going your way. However, if nothing starts to get better and the downspiral just keeps going farther and farther, then what do you do? Being at school isn't fun at all and you dread it, but then going home only seems to make everything worse because all your family ever does is scream at one another. I was hoping that Spring Break would give me a breather so I could start with new patience, but living in one's tiny bedroom eating on your lap because you want to avoid the chaos out your door isn't at all comforting and I wish I could just be done with everything. Grrrrrrrrr.

Happy Spring Break to everyone!

Larson 501 is a bower of luxury, full of futon, large living space, and christmas lights hooked into a clapper. It was really sad to look at 612, all empty and sterile-looking, and lock the door for the last time. I picked it in room draw and fell in love with it, so I guess it'll always feel like home. Still, Vanna has been wonderfully sweet and I feel like the end of the year will be better.

ANYWAY! :) Jimmy went home today after spending the week with me at home and at Grant's. Sometimes I'm afraid that I forget how good we are together! Jimmy is my other half and it's easy to look over how natural that feels until woop he's driving away and suddenly I think "wow, I'm never gonna meet another guy like that in a million years." I suppose it's good for life to feel normal as long as you can remember the wonderfully little things. Mmm... like manically doing one's hair in the mirror.

Happy travels everyone.

Now that I know so many of you keep up with the happenings at Mansfield Park, I'm sure you'll wonder where my entries went. I decided to take them out because they were being misunderstood and I want to avoid judgment for recording what I'm think here. So, other than some news briefs, I am going to keep the blog pretty fluffy for the next several entries.

News:

-I am moving out of my room to hopefully another place in Larson. It gets sticky because I can't leave the dorm if I want to keep my desk job, so I am going to explore vacancies on the 2nd, 5th, and 9th floors.
-With any luck, this will be an empowering and sanity-saving decision for everyone concerned.
-If you're on campus for Friday night and want to help me move (yee-haw), please drop me an email at andersol@stolaf.edu.

What else! Hmmm... lots of decisions for everyone come out this week, so good luck RA/JC/summer job/study abroad hopefuls -- I'll be wishing you luck!

4 days until the end of classes... we can do it!

omg... look at this message I got while trying to change my password: Please avoid two-word combinations like "chas" and "kategorische". needless to say, they were onto my efforts to "kategorische". damn them.

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Tonight is the night of the environmental studies discussion reunion with Beth and Brittany at 5:30 for dinner! YUM! And of course, tomorrow is Jimmy's birthday, so I have lots of fun stuff to get ready for him. :) Talk to you all later and have a great night!

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Hey guys... I'm realizing my quaint little blog has a larger readership than I had previously thought. I'd like to clarify a few things:

-this is a journal for me to talk about my life, the world as I perceive it, and a place to vent.
-it is not meant to put anyone else down or to make pointed comments intended to hurt, frustrate, or anger anyone
-things written here are recorded as I observe them and view them and I realize it won't be 100% impartial because nothing really ever can be
-the link in my profile (which I will be deleting tonight) says "read at your own risk" -- I realize that things that go on in the world and in everyone's lives are often controversial and mine is no different, so please do not hold me accountable for recording what happens to me and how I feel about
-if you have a problem with what you read here, I suggest writing me an email or coming to talk to me -- it would probably make you feel better in the long run
-and speaking of talks, I'm all for honesty, but I think that true honesty incorporates a considerable amount of compassion, politeness and some tact

Phew, I think I'm done for the moment. This has been the worst few days I've had yet in college and that includes being very depressed for most of last year. A little understanding would be greatly appreciated and it's no less than I would do for any of you.

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So, I've been reading my ecology book faithfully all semester. We're about a third of the way through it already. Not bad. The last chapter (we started 2/3 into it) is about conservation and pressing ecological problems. Now after hundreds of pages of random studies done by scientists who were obviously bored and had money to blow or just weren't feeling creative, we're getting somewhere! This is exactly the stuff that gets me going: cleaning up watersheds, moving species north as the climate changes rapidly, looking at land transformations. Maybe I just get sadistic pleasure out of natural disasters? But more I think that helping out the planet and her species is more noble than studying a random species interaction for the rest of your life. I want to pursue this all, but I'm not sure what to call it or what I can do with it. Is this conservation biology? Is it just environmental science? Who knows, but all I can say is, count me in.